Too Much Prayer

Good morning, good God!

I can't get the story out of my head, Lord...
the story you told of the rich man
who had so much grain and so many goods
he had to tear down his barns to build larger ones...

I don't have a barn, Lord,
not a large one, not even a small one --
but I've got closets and bureaus,
drawers and boxes,
wallets, purses and portfolios,
trunks and canvas bags,
the cellar, the attic and a spare room and...
and I have so much more than I need, Lord,
so much more than I need...

I have too much stuff...
I have too many things...
I collect things I don't need...
I have multiples of things I only need one of...
I have too many vestments, too many shoes
and too many clothes
(too many that fit and too many that don't)...
I have too many toys of all kinds and varieties..
I have too much money...

And the money thing -
that's what defines the dilemma, Lord...
It's not that I have a lot of money, I don't -
but when I look around the world, I know
I have more than I need...

I have more than I need of so many things...

That's the hard question, Lord:
how much of anything do I really need...?

When I ponder that question honestly,
I know I have much more than I need...

I'm not going to offer you all my stuff, Lord -
you don't need it, you don't want it...

But I have these to offer, Lord,
parts of me that need healing...

I offer for your mercy and healing:
my desire to have more and more...
my desire to have more than I need...
my desire for collecting things for the sake of collecting them...
my desire to have more for more's sake...
my desire to have more than others have...
my desire to buy, to have, to get, to grab, to own:
the fastest, the newest, the sleekest whatever-it-might-be
- and to have it before others do...

I offer for your mercy and healing
my need to have...
My need to have:
full shelves, full closets,
full bank accounts,
full boxes and bags of whatever I want
- and my need to still want more...

I offer for your mercy and healing
my tendency to stuff the empty places in my heart
with junk, with filler,
with the material, with the make-believe,
with so much less
than my heart deserves,
so much less than I deserve
so much less than you want for me, Lord...

I offer for your healing
the impulse to fill myself with so much less
than the lasting treasures my heart longs for,
the gifts you offer me every day...

Help me simplify my life, Lord...
Help me give away, give up,
clean out, cast off, go without,
do without, strip away,
and lighten the load:
to empty my heart
of anything less than what it deserves,
anything less than what truly satisfies...

And make me generous, Lord,
in sharing and giving to others the things I have
and for which so many have a much greater need...

Help me see the needs
of those whose paths cross mine this day, Lord,
and open my heart to be ready to give freely,
without counting the cost...

Such is my prayer's offering this Monday morning, Lord
and through this day and night
and the through all the week ahead...

Amen.

(from A Concord Pastor Comments blog)

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