For My Sins, Which are Many and Manifold

Essence beyond essence, Nature increate,
Framer of the world,
I set thee, Lord, before me,
and unto Thee do I lift up my soul.
I worship Thee on my knees,
and humble myself under Thy mighty hand.
I stretch forth my hands unto Thee:
my soul thirsteth after Thee, as a thirsty land.

I smite upon my breast,
and say, with the publican,
God be merciful to me a sinner,
the chief of sinners;
to the sinner above the publican
be merciful, as to the publican.
Father of mercies, I beseech Thy fatherly pity,
despise me not,
an unclean worm, a dead dog, a body of death;
despise not Thou the work of Thine own hands;
despise not Thine own image,
though bearing the brands of sin.
Lord, if Thou wilt, Thou canst make me clean.
Lord, speak the word only, and I shall be healed.

And Thou, my Saviour Christ,
Christ my Saviour,
Saviour of sinners, of whom I am chief,
despise me not; despise me not, O Lord,
who am purchased with Thy blood,
called by Thy name;
but look on me with those eyes
with which Thou didst look upon
Magdalene at the feast,
Peter in the hall,
the thief on the cross:
that with the thief I may entreat Thee humbly,
Lord, remember me when Thou comest
into Thy kingdom;
that with Peter I may weep bitterly and say,
O that mine eyes were a fountain of tears,
that I might weep day and night;
that with Magdalene I may hear Thee say,
Thy sins are forgiven thee,
and with her may love much,
for my sins, which are many and manifold,
are forgiven.

And Thou, all-holy, good, and life-giving Spirit,
despise me not, Thy breath,
despise not Thine own holy things;
but return, O Lord; how long?
and let it repent Thee concerning Thy servant.

(a prayer of Lancelot Andrewes, from Lancelot Andrewes and His Private Devotions)

Forgive Us Our Debts

Forgive us our debts. Literally.
Forgive the things I've charged or financed
to assuage my desires
instead of waiting,
instead of saving,
instead of giving.
Forgive the money I've wasted
on impulse purchases,
interest payments,
and fees and penalties.
Forgive the consumer mentality
that makes me buy now,
pay later,
pay more in the long run.
Teach me to wait,
to save,
to resist temptation,
in Jesus' name, amen.

(photo by Chance Agrella via freerangestock.com)

Disfigured

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

With my lustful desires I have formed within myself the deformity of the passions and disfigured the beauty of my mind.

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

I have discolored with the passions the first beauty of the image, O Savior. But seek me, as once Thou hast sought the lost coin, and find me.

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

Like the Harlot I cry to Thee: I have sinned, I alone have sinned against Thee. Accept my tears also as sweet ointment, O Savior.

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

Like David, I have fallen into lust and I am covered with filth; but wash me clean, O Savior, by my tears.

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

Like the Publican I cry to Thee: Be merciful, O Savior, be merciful to me. For no child of Adam has ever sinned against Thee as I have sinned.

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

I have no tears, no repentance, no compunction; but as God do Thou Thyself, O Savior, bestow them on me.

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

Lord, Lord, at the Last Day shut not Thy door against me; but open it to me, for I repent before Thee.

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

O Lover of mankind, who desirest that all men shall be saved, in Thy goodness call me back and accept me in repentance.

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me.

Give ear to the groaning of my soul, and accept the tears that fall from mine eyes; O Lord, save me.

(excerpt from The Great Canon of Repentance, Ode Two, by St. Andrew, Bishop of Crete; image via pixabay.com)

Forgive My Prayers

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Abba, Father,

forgive my prayers.

Forgive all the misguided prayers I have prayed.

All the selfish prayers.

All the self-righteous prayers.

All the stupid prayers.

All the small-faith prayers.

Forgive the prayers I have "preached"

instead of truly prayed.

Forgive the times I have only or mostly

mouthed the words.

Forgive the countless times

I have prayed only what was on my heart,

not even bothering to seek what was on your heart.

Forgive the weak prayers.

The manipulative prayers.

The faithless prayers.

The feckless prayers.

The fraudulent prayers.

Forgive, Lord,

and thank you more than I can say

that you still listen...

after all that.

Amen.

 

Mercy

Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Lord, have mercy on me, a husband.

Lord, have mercy on me, a father.

Lord, have mercy on me, a grandfather.

Lord, have mercy on me, a son.

Lord, have mercy on me, a brother.

Lord, have mercy on me, a writer.

Lord, have mercy on me, a friend.

Lord, have mercy on me, a man.

Lord, have mercy on me, your child.

(photo by Hassan Saleh via Unsplash.com)

All Ague

Lord, how I am all ague, when I seek

What I have treasur'd in my memory!

Since, if my soul make even with the week,

Each seventh note by right is due to thee.

I find there quarries of pil'd vanities,

But shreds of holiness, that dare not venture

To show their face, since cross to thy decrees:

There the circumference earth is, heav'n the centre.

In so much dregs the quintessence is small:

The spirit and good extract of my heart

Comes to about the many hundredth part.

Yet Lord restore thine image, hear my call:

And though my hard heart scarce to thee can groan,

Remember that thou once didst write in stone.

(by George Herbert; photo by kentro via unsplash.com)

Wanderer's Prayer

Lord God, Lover of my soul, you have done so much for me. You have made known to me the path of life and filled me with joy in your presence (Psalm 16:11). Yet, I confess that I am prone to wander, prone to leave the God I love. Please have mercy on my feeble and fickle heart, and help me to be properly warned by your Word. Help me not to tolerate even the slightest distance from you and, if I do wander, to turn quickly back to you, the source of all my blessing and joy. Make me and keep me wholly and always devoted to you. In Jesus’ name, amen.

(from Falling in Love with God)

Which I Do Not Now

God, you are my God, 
and I seek you this morning;
let my prayers rise before you 
like the morning sacrifice.

Please grant that I may seek you wholeheartedly,
which I confess I do not now.

Grant that I may seek you only,
which I do not now.

Grant that I may seek you moment-by-moment,
consistently, and constantly,
which I do not now,
for I need you constantly and completely
and only, amen. 

I Do Repent

 

Dull Imaginings

God forgive us
that we have imagined true humanness,
after the Enlightenment model,
to mean being successful,
having it all together,
knowing all the answers,
never making mistakes,
striding through the world as though we owned it.

(a prayer of N. T. Wright, from The Challenge of Jesus, p. 193; photo by Amazos7 via pixabay.com).

Like Sheep Who Go Astray

God of hope and safety, like sheep who go astray, we have wandered from your paths of life and light. We have heard the Shepherd's voice calling us by name, but we have turned instead to our own way. Show us your tender mercy; restore us in the security of your fold. Lead us back to still waters, seat us again at your bounteous table. Fill us with your Spirit, that we might bear glad witness to your saving mercy, revealed to us in the Great Shepherd, Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen.

(a prayer from beliefnet.com; photo of Myeongdong Cathedral, South Korea, by Bundo Kim, via unsplash.com)

Misplaced

The pride which leads me 

to trust in myself

and not in you,

O Lord, forgive. Amen.

(based on a plaque in Coventry Cathedral; photo by @spiritvisionstudios via unsplash.com)

Forgive The Prayers

Abba, Father,
forgive my prayers.
Forgive all the misguided prayers I have prayed.
All the selfish prayers.
All the self-righteous prayers.
All the stupid prayers.
All the small-faith prayers.

Forgive the prayers I have "preached"
instead of truly prayed.

Forgive the times I have only or mostly
mouthed the words.

Forgive the countless times
I have prayed only what was on my heart,
not even bothering to seek what was on your heart.

Forgive the weak prayers.
The manipulative prayers.
The faithless prayers.
The feckless prayers.
The fraudulent prayers.

Forgive, Lord,
and thank you more than I can say
that you still listen...
after all that.
Amen.

The Myth of More

God, I confess my desire to acquire and repent of my consumerism. I confess that I sometimes believe that having more things will make me happier, more important, or more secure. Please teach me to be grateful for what I have instead of always wanting something new or something more. Teach me to defy the myth of more and set my mind and heart on eternal things instead of material things. Teach me to keep my life free from the love of money and possessions and be content with what I have, in Jesus’ name, amen. 

 (the prayer that closes chapter two, "The eBay Attitude," in my book, American Idols)

The Pride Which Leads

    The pride which leads me 

    to trust in myself 

    and not in you, 

    O Lord, forgive. Amen. 

    (based on a plaque in Coventry Cathedral)

True Humanness

God forgive us
that we have imagined true humanness,
after the Enlightenment model,
to mean being successful,
having it all together,
knowing all the answers,
never making mistakes,
striding through the world as though we owned it

(a prayer of N. T. Wright, from The Challenge of Jesus, p. 193; photo by Amazos7 via pixabay.com).

Wilt Thou Forgive

Wilt Thou forgive that sin where I begun,
Which was my sin, though it were done before?
Wilt Thou forgive that sin, through which I run,
And do run still, though still I do deplore?
When Thou hast done, Thou hast not done,
For I have more.

Wilt Thou forgive that sin which I have won
Others to sin, and made my sin their door?
Wilt Thou forgive that sin which I did shun
A year or two, but wallowed in a score?
When Thou hast done, Thou hast not done,
For I have more.

I have a sin of fear, that when I have spun
My last thread, I shall perish on the shore;
But swear by Thyself, that at my death Thy Son
Shall shine as he shines now, and heretofore;
And having done that, Thou hast done;
I fear no more.

(a prayer of John Donne; illustration by JuiMagicMan via pixabay.com)

Gears

Forgive me, Lord Jesus, for doing the things that make me feel uncomfortable and guilty when I pray.

I say that I believe in you, yet I doubt your promises.

I say that in God I trust, yet I worry and try to manage my own affairs.

I say that I love you, O Lord, and yet I do not obey you.

I say that you have the answers to all my problems, and yet I am slow to consult you.

Forgive me, Lord, for my lack of faith and the willful pride that ignores the way, the truth, and the life.

Please reach down and change the gears within me that I may go forward with you, amen.

(a prayer of Peter Marshall, slightly revised; photo via pixabay.com)

All

I love you, Lord, my Strength.
I love you to the height and length
and depth of all there is of me,
with all my aching, flawed emotion,
all the grateful, awed devotion
all the all-in-all could draw from me.

I Beseech Thy Fatherly Pity

Essence beyond essence, Nature increate,
Framer of the world,
I set thee, Lord, before me,
and unto Thee do I lift up my soul.
I worship Thee on my knees,
and humble myself under Thy mighty hand.
I stretch forth my hands unto Thee:
my soul thirsteth after Thee, as a thirsty land.

I smite upon my breast,
and say, with the publican,
God be merciful to me a sinner,
the chief of sinners;
to the sinner above the publican
be merciful, as to the publican.
Father of mercies, I beseech Thy fatherly pity,
despise me not,
an unclean worm, a dead dog, a body of death;
despise not Thou the work of Thine own hands;
despise not Thine own image,
though bearing the brands of sin.
Lord, if Thou wilt, Thou canst make me clean.
Lord, speak the word only, and I shall be healed.

And Thou, my Saviour Christ,
Christ my Saviour,
Saviour of sinners, of whom I am chief,
despise me not; despise me not, O Lord,
who am purchased with Thy blood,
called by Thy name;
but look on me with those eyes
with which Thou didst look upon
Magdalene at the feast,
Peter in the hall,
the thief on the cross:
that with the thief I may entreat Thee humbly,
Lord, remember me when Thou comest
into Thy kingdom;
that with Peter I may weep bitterly and say,
O that mine eyes were a fountain of tears,
that I might weep day and night;
that with Magdalene I may hear Thee say,
Thy sins are forgiven thee,
and with her may love much,
for my sins, which are many and manifold,
are forgiven.

And Thou, all-holy, good, and life-giving Spirit,
despise me not, Thy breath,
despise not Thine own holy things;
but return, O Lord; how long?
and let it repent Thee concerning Thy servant.

(a prayer of Lancelot Andrewes, from Lancelot Andrewes and His Private Devotions)