For the Blessings of a Teetotaler

Lord, thank you
that I've never been drunk,
have never suffered a hangover,
never blacked out,
never embarrassed myself or my loved ones
by drunken behavior,
never hurt myself or others
while under the influence,
and never made life-changing alcohol- or drug-induced decisions to later, deep regret.
Thank you that through no special effort or particular credit of mine
I've enjoyed the blessings of being a nearly total teetotaler all of my life,  in Jesus' name, amen.

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